Borderless Welcome, Boundless Love

“Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who are mistreated as if you yourself were suffering.”- Hebrews 13:1-3 City folks call this the middle of nowhere. No hotels, no grocery chains, no department stores, no Starbucks, nowhere to go. This is Lumpkin, a rural town in Stewart County, the poorest county in Georgia. Yet to immigrants in the southeastern United States, Lumpkin is infamous. It is the home of the Stewart County Detention Center, the largest non-citizen detention center in the nation.

I am a volunteer with Friends in Hope, an initiative of Lutheran Services of Georgia (LSG) that coordinates visits between volunteers and Stewart detainees. This is my first time in Lumpkin. Getting to Lumpkin requires a three-hour drive from Atlanta through increasingly sparse land and into a town with almost no cell phone service. On this Saturday morning, the other LSG volunteers and I begin our day at El Refugio, a hospitality house for the friends and families of detainees. As Lumpkin has nowhere else for visitors to stay, El Refugio is truly a place of refuge. Weekends are especially busy at El Refugio, and the quaint, yellow house is full of life and chatter. While we eat lunch with the El Refugio volunteers, a Spanish-speaking mother and her children enter and ask to use the restroom. The water has been cut off at Stewart, leaving visitors without a place to relieve themselves. The El Refugio volunteers greet them warmly in Spanish, offering food, water, a place to refresh themselves, and an invitation to stay the night if they need. I watch in awe as El Refugio embodies borderless welcome and hospitality. At 12:45, we gather our things--passports or driver’s licenses, water bottles, and books--and drive the mile to the center.

Outside the Stewart Detention Center, the barbed-wire fence stretches in both directions. It is a wall not unlike that along our nation’s border or along the West Bank. The fence separates the citizen from the non-citizen, the free person from the detainee. It is constructed from the arbitrary differences and categories we use to separate us from those we see as other. Languishing inside Stewart are male detainees awaiting immigration proceedings with nothing but dwindling hope and the occasional visitor to keep them from despair. Of these men, 98.8% will be deported, cut off from the families, jobs, freedoms, and futures that drew them to the United States.

Although federal and state bodies distinguish between detention centers and prisons, detainees rarely experience this difference. Stewart County Detention Center is under the management of the Corrections Corporation of America (CCA), the nation’s largest private prison company. In 2010, CCA boasted an annual revenue of $1.7 billion (ACLU Georgia). As a for-profit, private corporation, CCA has cut corners without any real reprimands from the United States Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). Georgia Detention Watch has documented instances of human rights violations in both of the CCA-operated detention centers in Georgia: North Georgia Detention Center and Stewart County. Even more disturbing is that CCA profits from detaining masses of people for long periods of time without honoring ICE detention standards. to the detainees and their communities, Stewart Detention Center is a prison.

We crowd into the tiny waiting room and timidly approach the security guard. I am surprised to learn that the visitor paperwork requires all visitors to list their immigration status. As I think of those unable to visit their families because they cannot answer this question without fear, I write “U.S. Citizen”, a label I have done nothing to earn. I was simply born in the right place at the right time. We hand our paperwork and photo identification to the guard, and the waiting begins.

The Stewart waiting room is far too small for the families and friends who spend hours waiting to visit loved ones. Visitors chat with each other, newcomers asking questions about what to expect. Even though CCA is contractually obligated to tailor its policies to visitors, visitors are often turned away for the slightest of offenses. If your child misbehaves in the waiting room, the guard may turn you away. If you wear a shirt without sleeves or forget to put on closed-toed shoes, the guard may turn you away. The guard refuses one of my companions because her underwire bra set off the metal detector. We cannot find anywhere to sit together, so we go outside to wait on the benches.

Hours pass. At 4:00 pm, we still have not been admitted to visit our detainees. The guard informs us that visitation hours end at four, but they will allow us in. They can only guarantee us 15 minutes. They make us feel as if they are doing us a huge favor. Along with the other visitors, I walk through the metal detector, silently praying the guards will not turn me away. An argument breaks out as one gentleman who was not with our group, frustrated with the process, makes a sardonic remark about CCA and the injustice of for-profit prisons. The guards respond without passion; they’ve heard it before.

My friend and I store our belongings in a locker and are ushered through the door, down a whitewashed hallway, and into a small visitation room. All visits at Stewart, including legal visits, are non-contact. Visitors must speak with detainees through glass plates by talking on a phone. There are five phone booths in the room, lined up in a row. Panic sets in when we realize we do not know the face of the detainee, so we choose an unoccupied booth, pick up the phone and ask, “Are you Alberto?*” We have chosen correctly.

As we converse, I am aware that anyone in the room could be listening. There is no privacy. I press the phone to my ear and listen as the man on the other side of the glass speaks. Alberto is expressive. He tells his story through words, but also through the raising of an eyebrow, the flash of a dimpled smile, the twinkle or tear in his eye. Even when I pass the phone to my friend, I cannot look away from his mesmerizing face. His story is one of sorrow, of isolation, of loneliness, and ultimately of strength. He tells of his love of poetry, of his family, and of a God who will always be with him. He gives love through the glass, affirming us and encouraging us in our own lives outside the center.

On Sunday morning, the following day, I listen to Anton Flores speak about love. As co-founder of the Alterna Community, a Christian community that offers “accompaniment, advocacy, and hospitality to Latin American immigrants,” Flores knows that real love always scales walls and cross borders. I sit with the congregation of Oakhurst Presbyterian and remember the families, friends, volunteers, and detainees that live out boundless love every day.

In Hebrews 13:1-3, Paul urges the Hebrews to practice borderless welcome and boundless love in the midst of persecution. I believe Paul’s words have special relevance for us today as we examine how we treat the strangers among us. At the heart of the world’s major religious traditions is a call to welcome the stranger, no matter her race, color, creed, or immigration status. We live in a nation where private corporations earn a profit from detaining the stranger and cutting him off from freedom. We live in a nation where the “foreigner” is more likely to encounter hateful speech than welcoming arms. We live in a nation where immigrants who have not committed violent crime are kept for months under prisonlike conditions, allowed only one visit per week and often denied access to adequate legal representation. Where is our holy rage?

Behind the barbed-wire fence, Alberto remains a fully-formed, flesh-and-blood human being capable of doing what human beings are meant to do--giving and receiving love. The combined forces of xenophobia, intolerance, and U.S. immigration law cannot erase his humanity no matter how they try. The walls of Stewart cannot stand in the way of shared humanity and of love that refuses to stay within our man-made borders.

As a person of faith, I encourage communities of faith throughout the United States to educate themselves about immigration and stand alongside the foreigner. I encourage you to travel to detention centers, to meet the people too often demonized as “other,” as “less than,” as “nonhuman”, as “illegal”. I encourage you to stand against those who would turn the stranger into someone to be feared rather than an opportunity to show God’s borderless hospitality. But most of all, I encourage you to “keeping on loving one another” with an unceasing love that knows no boundaries.

*Name has been changed for his protection.

Abby Koning is the community outreach coordinator for the ELCA Southeastern Synod.

A Day in the Life with Guru (Part IV)

At 11 a.m., after we have visited two families and Guru has patiently answered all of my nosy questions, it is time for some food. There is only one Nepalese restaurant in Clarkston—and it happens to have Bhutanese owners—so we walk into “Kathmandu Kitchen & Grill,” named after the capital of Nepal, to eat our early lunch. As I can tell from the buffet line, Nepalese cuisine features dishes with a lot of rice and vegetables, as well as various meats. Curry is common, as is a dish called “dal-bhat-tarkari,” which Guru insists that I try. “Dal” is a stew that contains split lentils, tomatoes, onion, and a host of spices; it is a staple that those in Nepal sometimes eat twice daily. A somewhat cautious eater, I try to be as adventurous as possible, picking out some fiery-looking chicken to go with my rice, vegetable stir-fry, chick-pea stew, and naan.

I am rewarded for every risk that I take: the “dal” is thick and delicious; the chicken is tender and spicy, though not as spicy as it looks; the naan complements the stews perfectly. It is a memorable way to end my morning with Guru. When he drops me off at the Avondale train station a half-hour later, the skies have cleared, and I can stroll around outside for a few minutes before taking the train back to work. Not so for Guru: once I close the door, he’s off again, heading out to Clarkston to drive the rest of his clients to their health screenings.

Jeff Banks is the communications coordinator for LSG. If you have questions or comments, please contact him at jbanks@lsga.org.

A Day in the Life with Guru (Part III)

After Guru and I leave Rajesh’s townhouse, we drive over to Southern Place, the apartment complex where LSG houses many of its refugee clients. The townhouse of the family we are visiting next is similar to the one in which Rajesh lives, except that this one is made of brick.

We walk into the complex and knock at the door of the family’s apartment. After some audible fumbling with the lock, a Bhutanese man opens the door and welcomes us. Half-expecting to see another solitary person in his apartment, I am surprised to see a large family waiting inside the living room. The father invites me to sit on a couch, and Guru settles into a spot beside me. No one in this family speaks English, and while Guru can translate easily for me, I find myself unsure of what to say or whom to address.

But soon our conversation gets going, and before long, with Guru’s help, we are talking about Bhutan, farming, and modern technology. Damber Gurung was a farmer in Bhutan before he and his family had to flee to a refugee camp in Nepal in 1992. The eldest daughter, now 20, was two-months old when the family left Bhutan for Nepal. Damber’s other two daughters were born in the refugee camp, so none of the children remembers Bhutan. The family arrived in America in early September, not quite two weeks ago. Because they have come to Atlanta so recently, they are just beginning to adjust to the new conditions and way of life in the U.S. During an awkward pause in our conversation, unable to think of anything interesting to say, I resort to the easiest escape from silence: I ask what they think of Atlanta’s tall buildings. Damber says that they are unlike anything he has ever seen, and tells me that while his wife was afraid on the elevator ride to the 18th floor of the Woodruff Volunteer Center, where LSG’s office is located, he assures me that he rode without any fear. Soon we are wrapping up our discussion, with Guru telling Damber about food stamps and orientation at LSG. After a round of goodbyes, during which I try to pronounce “dhanyawad,” a way of saying “thank you” in Hindi that I learned from Guru, we walk out to the minivan.

Check out the blog next Thursday for the fourth and final installment of A Day in the Life.

Jeff Banks is the communications coordinator for LSG. Please contact him at jbanks@lsga.org with any questions or comments.

A Day in the Life with Guru (Part II)

Although Bhutanese refugees may experience some relief at being resettled to a new country such as the United States, where they can begin to build new lives, they often encounter considerable challenges in the first few months. Not able to speak the language, these newcomers do not easily find work. Once they find a job, a process that the case manager and others in LSG help them through, they have difficulty getting to it, especially if the job is in a poultry processing plant that is not easily accessible by public transportation. Since few of the refugees are able to drive, let alone afford a car, they ride in a van driven by a more experienced refugee. This carpooling can be efficient, but if the driver quits his job or moves to a different city, the new employees are temporarily stranded at home. When we arrive in Clarkston, Guru points to the different places that serve the refugee community: the health clinic; Georgia Piedmont Technical College, where the refugees receive English lessons; and the apartment complexes where many live. Soon afterward we drive up to the townhouse of our first host, a man who recently arrived from a refugee camp in Nepal.

Rajesh Rai opens the door and invites us in. He greets me by placing his hands together in front of his chest and saying “Namaste” with a slight bow—the traditional Nepalese greeting. Then we shake hands—an American addendum to the introduction. Walking through the doorway, I first notice the number of shoes and sandals lying at the foot of the stairs. These, Guru tells me, are donations from the clothing drives sponsored by LSG. To the left of the doorway is the kitchen, where a large rice-cooker is at work on the counter. Out in front of me I see a table pushed against a wall with several chairs next to it, as well as a couple of comfortable-looking couches. Rajesh invites us into this living room, and we plop down on the couches.

Having served as an English teacher in the Nepalese refugee camp, Rajesh understands and speaks some English. We begin to discuss his life in Atlanta, but our conversation eventually flows to his family and his background. For all the difficulties faced by refugees as they are uprooted from their homes, placed into temporary camps, and then transplanted into a new country, their stories are also filled with moments of joy. Rajesh recounts one of these moments. Two years ago, his wife, pregnant with their daughter, came to America, leaving Rajesh behind in the refugee camp. This summer Rajesh was finally granted permission to come to the United States, and on August 7 he moved in with his wife and two-year-old daughter, whom he had never seen. At first, he told me, his daughter was hesitant toward him, for, after all, he was a new presence in her life. But now, after having been with him for a month and a half, she crawls onto his lap without reservation.

Check back here next week for the third installment of A Day in the Life

Jeff Banks is the communications coordinator for Lutheran Services of Georgia. If you have questions or comments, please contact him at jbanks@lsga.org

Stories from FACES: Michael and Joey thrive in new homes

Through its FACES (Facilitating, Advocacy, Care, Education, and Shelter) program, LSG provides care to adults with developmental disabilities. For the FACES staff, providing care means much more than making sure that each individual has a bed to sleep on; it means finding a home for every person. Through the generous contributions of time and energy by the staff who discover places for clients to live and by the in-home companions who support the clients, FACES often succeeds in giving clients the experience of being at a home. This success was summed up recently in a comment made by the sister of a client when the two of them visited a house that he would be staying in. Walking down the front steps of the house after the visit, the sister said, “This is not just a place; this is a home.” When given the comfort, support, and care that a home offers, individuals with developmental disabilities can thrive. Here are stories of two clients who have become more independent and self-reliant in their environments.

In February, 2012, Michael moved to a different host home and quickly acclimated to his new surroundings. Since then, he has demonstrated his independence by beginning to work at Dollar Tree and by using his own cell phone. Michael is thoroughly enjoying these and other opportunities that his new host home is giving him.

After being placed unsuccessfully into several homes, Joey moved to a new host home in October, 2011. In this most recent home, Joey has found the stability and support that allow him to express his feelings positively. He has shown great improvement in the past few years, making healthy choices, learning to communicate constructively, and immersing himself in the activities of his community. Joey now attends a day program, has a steady girlfriend, and recently went to the People First Conference on Jekyll Island.

"A Day in the Life" with Guru

It is 9 a.m. and rain falls steadily outside the Avondale train station in Decatur, where a group of commuters lingers under the roof of the station, hesitant to get wet so early in the morning. Some people, however, do not have the luxury of waiting around until the rain abates. For a refugee services case manager, the morning is already in full swing: rain or shine, refugee clients need to be driven to health screenings, English lessons, work interviews, and orientations. Guru, one of LSG’s Refugee Services case managers, has already been quite busy this morning. When he pulls into the train station in his minivan to pick me up a few minutes after nine, he has already shuttled several clients to a clinic near Clarkston.

Guru has graciously agreed to take an inexperienced and inquisitive intern along with him while he visits families in Clarkston. As we drive on Ponce de Leon Avenue toward our destination, Guru tells me a little bit about his own story and how it relates to other refugees’ experiences. Originally from Bhutan, Guru came to the United States in 2008, after having spent 17 years as a refugee, mostly in a refugee camp in Nepal. It is not uncommon for refugees from Bhutan to have spent as many as twenty years in a Nepalese refugee camp. In the early 1990s, the Lhotshampas, the Nepali-speaking ethnic group from the south of Bhutan, were expelled from the country. To grasp the reason for this expulsion, one must understand the relationships between Bhutan’s various ethnic groups.

The ethnic groups in Bhutan have different customs and languages. The Ngalops, from the west of Bhutan, are the dominant ethnic group in Bhutan, controlling the government and dictating the cultural norms. The Sharchops, from the east, are the other powerful ethnic group. Together these two groups account for 65% of the population. The Lhotshampas constitute the other 35% of the population. Originally from Nepal, the Lhotshampas were invited by the Bhutanese government in the late 19th century to farm the land in the country’s southern, uninhabited foothills. The Lhotshampas were different from the powerful Ngalops—they spoke a different language, wore different clothes, and practiced a different religion—and these differences caused tension between the groups. In the 1980s, the Ngalop-controlled government began to view the Lhotshampas as a threat to the uniformity of its culture and implemented a series of political measures designed to impose the Ngalop’s culture on the Bhutanese people. In 1989, for example, the government mandated that people wear traditional, northern dress in public or risk incurring a fine—a policy that forces the Lhotshampas in the south to change their customs of dress. Once the Lhotshampas protested this policy and others like it, the government went a step further and began to expel Lhotshampas from the country in the early 1990s. Because the Lhotshampas shared a language and other aspects of culture with Nepalese citizens, they settled in camps there.

Seven Bhutanese refugee camps were set up in eastern Nepal, and the refugee population in those camps grew from 80,000 in 1992 to 105,000 in 2007. According to the UN Refugee Agency (UNHCR), as of January 31, 2012, only three of those seven original camps remain, in which 53,886 refugees live. The number of refugees and camps has declined because the inhabitants have been resettled permanently to other countries such as the United States, Australia, and Denmark. Finally moving from a refugee camp to a new country can be good news for someone who desires the security and comfort that were lacking in the camps. As Guru reminds me, though, many of these refugees have had to spend almost 20 years living in these camps, unable to find much work, reliant on the UNHCR for food, clothing, and shelter. For some, the relief at moving to a new country may be tempered by a sense of loss—of one’s home and of one’s time.

Websites consulted: http://www.unhcr.org; http://www.bhutaneserefugees.com

Check out the blog this following Thursday for the next section of A Day in the Life with Guru

Jeff Banks is the communications coordinator for LSG. If you have questions or comments, please contact him at jbanks@lsga.org.

Refugee Services Intern reflects on trip to Ethiopia

Recently, I had the wonderful opportunity to join my parents on a trip to Ethiopia. Through my internship at Lutheran Services of Georgia as well as volunteering with the Clarkston Community Center this summer, I have had multiple exposures to Ethiopians as well as knowledge of their culture. Regardless, traveling to their homeland brought a much more realistic and rich picture of the country.

Upon arriving, I first noticed how extremely kind and friendly the people were to us. Though they face difficulties from economic aspects as well as physical needs, their hearts are grateful and full of joy. I was able to visit four different villages and play with the children there through the local churches. We organized games with balloons, bubbles, candy and more! It was a great time of fun.

For a specific village, we took the children to a nearby restaurant for a special meal. As they sat awaiting the food patiently, they eagerly tried to teach us Amharic and loudly laughed as we attempted to imitate the sounds of the words. Once the food arrived, their mouths watered and their eyes shined. As I was sitting with the girls, they broke the pieces of injera and dipped it in the meet tibs; quickly without hesitation they brought it to my mouth! My heart was touched as these hungry children chose to put me and honor me first. When I denied kindly and told them to eat, they insisted on feeding me. It was a moment that taught me what true, purely innocent love is.

As the trip continued, we were able to interact with many Ethiopians who recently put their faith in Jesus. It was powerful to see many baptized and hear their miraculous testimonies as well as faith in the midst of persecution. I was able to also ask about their thoughts and views on Ethiopia being a refugee-sending nation. We also discussed nonprofit organizations and how they function as well as their impact on the nation. It was a great way to use the trip as way to apply my studies form Georgia State University as well as my internship experience with LSG.

My trip to Ethiopia was memorable. I’m excited that I now can understand my fellow Ethiopian refugees from a deeper perspective. I pray this not be forgotten and that I go back one day and further my knowledge of the wonderful country and people!

Lydia Bassaly Refugee Services 2012 Summer Intern and Georgia State University Student

Welcome to the Team!

Along with the move to the new location in the precedent months, we, here in Family Intervention Services and Foster Care, have also acquired some invaluable new team members, with a variety of personalities and backgrounds, to help us advance the program and settle into the new place. To get to know the rookies a little more, here is a brief summary of their background and path that led them to join LSG. Welcome to the Team!

Getting to Know Blair

Many of us know Blair in his role as President and CEO of Lutheran Services of Georgia. But he, like everyone else, has a life outside of the office. Learn a little about that life by reading the Q & A below. What is your favorite movie? Blair: I have so many. I like action/adventure. I’m going to have to say The Die Hard series.

What is your comfort food? Blair: French Fries.

Where do you like to vacation? Blair: Cancun.

What is the best part about working in this new office building? Blair: Location. Location. Location.

What item do you always put in your office? Blair: That mural. When I ran the juvenile services division for the state of Connecticut, one of my incarcerated teenagers painted that jazz mural for me, so I always put that up on the wall because it shows me the kind of talent that we keep locked behind bars versus not realizing the talent outside in the real world. If we could do the reverse, we’d have a much better society.

If you were isolated on an island and could only have three books, which three would you choose? Blair: The Bible. A comic book. Uncle Tom’s Cabin.

How do you alleviate stress? Blair: Work out.

What does your typical Sunday look like? Blair: I visit lots of churches on Sunday. When I was a vicar in Baltimore I did the 8 o’clock service and then I also did the 11 o’clock service. And then after that I’m normally a guest preacher at someone else’s church and then we end up either at home for a late dinner or a restaurant.

What is one thing you hope to accomplish before turning seventy? Blair: Abolish poverty—if I could.

What is the most important word or phrase or quotation in the English language for you? Is there something that captures your life philosophy? Blair: “Excuses are the building blocks of nothing.” Those who excel in them seldom do anything else. I don’t know who said it, but it’s something I’ve said to myself for a long time. We allow excuses sometimes to get in the way of real productivity and creativity. So if we excel in excuses, nothing will ever get done. That is another one: “Do not go quietly into the night.” So those two are probably the two important ones that I loop together as a focus for me and anyone I talk to.

Our Presidential Acceptance Speech

Presidents seem to be addressing their loyal followers at this time of year, and we at Lutheran Services of Georgia did not want to feel left out. So we asked our new president, The Rev. Floyd R. Blair, to say a few words about why he decided to become LSG’s leader.

Blair: I was recently asked the question, "Why did I come to LSG?" My answer was simple. LSG is the living embodiment of the scripture Matthew 25:31-46. “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

LSG has “for over 30 years helped tens of thousands transform their loss, grief and trauma into hope, healing and strength. From placing neglected children into loving homes to providing shelter and employment services for refugees each year, LSG serves thousands of those most in need,” hence LSG is relevant to the lives of people. The Matthew scripture tells us that “whatever you do for the least of these you do for God” LSG has served those who have had the least. As a child growing up in poverty and foster care, I understand the mission and necessity of LSG and its future relevancy connection to serving an even larger number of individuals in the State of Georgia. I wanted to be the new President and Chief Executive Officer of an organization that was not afraid to be bolder and more brilliant about serving and as it pushed the boundaries of service (to the least of these).

We’re excited to be bolder and to push the boundaries of our service under your leadership, Blair!

Heroes of Hope Photographs

Visit our facebook page to see photographs from last night's Heroes of Hope event!

A Man of Many Hats

This summer Gary Danielsen retired after serving for 18 years as President and CEO of Lutheran Services of Georgia. He will be honored Thursday evening at LSG’s annual Heroes of Hope event for his accomplishments and contributions to the agency. Some members of LSG’s staff were around to witness many of these accomplishments and contributions, having worked with Gary for all or most of the 18 years that he served as President and CEO. How do they remember him as a leader, coworker, and friend?

According to staff, Gary was an enthusiastic leader who was willing to take risks to expand LSG’s services. Gary Johnstone, now in his twelfth year at the agency, recalls a moment when LSG was attempting to broaden its FACES program. Gary D. persuaded investors to contribute $150,000 to finance the extension of FACES. “Those guys,” Gary J. explains, referring to the investors, “heard enough enthusiasm and belief coming out of him that they were willing to fly down to Atlanta and meet with us and discuss our program and then invest money, expecting nothing back—they just gave us the money—so it was a huge outcome for us, a huge benefit, and that was one of his major accomplishments for us.” Steve Oliver, also in his twelfth year, recounts another challenge that Gary confronted as LSG’s leader. In the fall of 2000, at a time when refugee services and adoption were LSG’s two main programs, Gary had to decide whether or not to expand the foster care and adult placement programs. He decided to finance the expansion of foster care and adult placement, a move which Steve thinks “required that he get out of his comfort zone.” Steve praises Gary’s willingness to take calculated risks and lauds his broad vision for the agency. “He actually saw the possibility of what could happen,” Steve adds, “and fortunately it paid off in growth without detracting from anything else.”

As an ordained minister in the Lutheran Church-Missouri Synod, Gary was also influenced by his faith. He was compassionate toward his employees and the clients of LSG’s services. Mary Kay Kates, who has worked at LSG for 22 years, describes Gary as a “very caring and compassionate person about everyone he met, but in particular about the clients we served and about the vulnerable populations in general.” Obaid Rasoul, who has been a refugee services case manager for 30 years, remarks that Gary would always ask about Obaid’s family when passing by in the hallway. Obaid also thinks that Gary deepened his concern for refugees and their families after returning from his time in the Middle East as an Army chaplain.

Not many people are CEOs, pastors, and Army Reserve members at the same time. As Steve remarks about Gary, “He had different hats.” “Sometimes you’d see him in the clerical collar,” Steve says, “and then there’s the uniform, and then there’s the suit, and then there’s the short-sleeve shirt.” “He could relax at a potluck lunch for someone leaving the office,” Steve continues, “but at the same time he could deliver a sermon to a Lutheran congregation and speak to the Board of Directors, and enjoy seeing a little baby get adopted.” A man of many hats indeed.

Did Gary have a sense of humor as well? You bet. Mary Kay points to the 1999 Hunger Walk as an example of Gary’s “fun-loving side.” To encourage the staff of LSG to raise funds for the Hunger Walk, the coordinator of the event convinced Gary to let the person who raised the most money hit him in the face with a pie. Who raised the most money? Mary Kay. A picture is worth more than a thousand words:

DFCS Statewide Adoption Matching Meeting 2012!

If you are interested in adopting an older child or a sibling group, please plan to attend the "Better Together” Statewide Adoption Matching Meeting. Case managers from across the state will be representing children who are waiting to be adopted through displays and video presentations. During the “Better Together” Statewide Adoption Matching Meeting you can receive more information about a particular child or children through direct contact with their case manager or representative. An informational meeting will also be held for those families who are just beginning the adoption process. Click here to view the flyer

FAMILY NIGHT Tuesday, August 14, 2012 6:00 p.m. – 8:00 p.m. Macon Centreplex The Edgar H. Wilson Convention Centre 200 Coliseum Drive, Macon, GA, 31217

For more information please contact your agency’s resource development case manager or Lisa Lumpe, DHS DFCS contractor, at lumpe@core.com or toll-free at (855) 289-0349.

This event is sponsored by the Georgia Department of Human Services and its partners All God’s Children, Bethany Christian Services, Families First, Georgia Mentor, It’s My Turn Now Georgia and Lutheran Services of Georgia. To learn more about becoming a foster or adoptive parent, please call (877) 210-KIDS.

FACES: A New Family for Johnny

Lutheran Services of Georgia is happy to share the success story of Johnny, a 19-year-old young man in the FACES program for adults with developmental disabilities.  When Johnny was a child, he was taken from his mother’s care after it was determined that her mental health issues prevented her from being able to properly care for her child. Johnny was placed in foster care through the Division of Family and Children Services, then lived in a hospital receiving treatment for his mental health needs. After almost six years in the hospital, Johnny was approved for Medicaid-funded services. Lutheran Services of Georgia helped place Johnny in a healthy, loving home under the care of several support companions. The support companions have provided a caring, stable family life for Johnny and helped him make positive developments through new relationships and experiences. Johnny has been to Florida with his new family several times and was able to see the ocean for the first time. He has learned to prepare some food – he loves to cook on a griddle with supervision from one of his support companions. Johnny, who has had no response to contact attempts with his biological family, considers his host home family his primary family.

LSG’s Newest Ministry: "Friends in Hope" - A Visitation Ministry to Immigrants in Detention

We are excited to introduce Lutheran Services of Georgia’s newest ministry, Friends in Hope, a visitation ministry to immigrants in detention. For years our national network, Lutheran Immigration and Refugee Services (LIRS), has advocated for the fair treatment and rebuilding of hope for our nation’s most vulnerable newcomers, including those affected by immigration detention. Lutheran Services of Georgia has received a start-up grant to rebuild hope through simple acts of compassion by visiting those housed in Georgia’s detention facilities.

Detainees are affected by what advocates call a flawed policy of mandatory detention for immigrants who may have only committed civil, not criminal, violations. They are imprisoned in harsh conditions for months at a time while awaiting deportation or approval for asylum. LIRS estimates that there are over 400,000 immigrant detainees housed in the U.S.  This means there are over 400,000 opportunities to answer Jesus Christ's call to serve the most vulnerable. LSG's Friends in Hope teams will visit and build relationships with detainees, each visit a simple act of compassion.  We invite you to join us in this new ministry.

The initial visits will be to detainees in the Stewart Detention Center in Lumpkin, Georgia.  LSG will partner with El Refugio, another LIRS visitation ministry grant recipient, which has a hospitality house for families of detainees located just outside the Stewart Detention Center.  You can visit the El Refugio website to learn more. Initially, Friends in Hope will be conducting monthly to bimonthly site visitations to offer compassionate support and to build relationships with detainees in the Stewart Detention Center. Prayerfully consider joining us in this ministry of hope and compassion. In addition to helping detainees rebuild hope through visits from a caring friend, Friends in Hope can contribute to creating a culture of welcome in the state of Georgia through friendship, advocacy, and community building.

Orientations for Friends in Hope volunteer visitors will be held on Saturdays, July 21, August 25, and September 29, from 10 a.m. to  noon at the centrally located Lutheran Church of the Redeemer in Midtown, Atlanta.  If you would like to attend one of these orientations to learn more about becoming a Friends in Hope visitor, please contact Melanie Johnson (mjohnson@lsga.org) at 404-875-0201 or 1-800-875-5645.

For more information on the Friends in Hope detention visitation ministry, contact Jacque Ulrich (julrich@lsga.org) or Melanie Johnson (mjohnson@lsga.org) at 404-875-0201 or 1-800-875-5645.

LSG Staff Superstar: Nartasha Davis!

Lutheran Services of Georgia would like to recognize Nartasha Davis for her incredible efforts and professionalism.  Davis was one of two providers in all of Region 6, which includes 31 Georgia counties, to receive recognition from the State Regional Office for her commitment to serving people with significant behavioral challenges.  Over the last two years, Nartasha has worked diligently to put the necessary resources in place for LSG’s Columbus office to serve people with behavioral challenges.  She identified and developed contractual relationships with a Board Certified Behavior Analyst.  She works closely with the behavioral specialist to ensure that the needs of LSG’s clients are being met.  Nartasha is able to independently assess people’s needs and put the appropriate supports in place from the ground up. Nartasha carries a caseload of 6-10 clients and has been an extremely effective recruiter of new clients.  Her office went from having little capacity to serve people with developmental disabilities a few years ago, to now having resources and structure to make a difference in many people’s lives.  The quality of support companions and services has greatly increased to the highest standards under her leadership.  Thank you, Nartasha, for all that you do!

ADOPTION: Positive Adoption Language Strengthens Family Relationships

The words we use convey a great deal about what we think and value. When we use positive adoption language, we are saying that adoption, like birth, is a way to build a family. Choosing positive adoption language helps to dispel the myths and misconceptions about adoption. Adoption may be a second choice, but it is never second best.

Positive Language	Negative Language	Explanation
Birth Parent	Real or natural parent	The use of negative terms implies that the adoption is not a reality or is unnatural. The term birthparent(s) describes the life-giving role these persons play in the child’s life.
My or our child	My or our adopted child	Adoption is a process, not an adjective. When the process is completed, the adopted person becomes just another child in the family. The term “my adopted child” implies a qualified relationship.
Make an adoption plan	Put up for adoption, give up, give away, surrender for adoption, relinquish	These are emotionally charged term, which do not reflect the fact that the birth parent(s) made a loving adoption plan that was well though out, challenging and in the child’s best interest.
We wanted and chose to be parents, and your birthparent(s) chose us	We chose you	A child may rationalize that if they were special enough to be chosen, then they must continue to be special in order to receive ongoing love and acceptance.
Decision to parent a child	Keep a child	The word implies that the child is an object and something which may be kept or not kept. The phrase “decision to parent the child” better reflects that parenting role and the decision making process in a respectful way to the child.
Child born to unmarried parents	Illegitimate child	The word “illegitimate” implied a negative situation for which the child is responsible and which also give a demeaning image to the child. The words “unmarried parents” indicated that there may be many situations which may leave parents unmarried (rape, death, divorce, too young to marry, etc).
Adoption participants	Adoption triad, triangle	The terms “triad” or “triangle” imply an opposing or adversarial relationship

Locate, making contact with birth relatives	Search, track down parents, reunite, reunion	The negative terms imply enforced separation, and convey a sense of desperation with regard to the experience of adoption. The term locate more accurately describes the act of contacting and meeting birth relatives.
Waiting children, children with special needs	Special needs children, hard to place children	The negative imply that the children are undesirable and less than normal.
Child placed for adoption	Child taken away	Placing for adoption conveys the positive and respectful way in which this plan is made for the child’s future.

ADOPTION: How Adoptive Parents Can Embrace and Feel Deserving of Their Parenting Role

Last weekend was the celebration of Mother’s Day, a day that for many adoptive mothers overflows with mixed emotions. Often adoptive families do not know how to “fit in” the concept of the birth mother with Mother’s Day. This brings us to a topic that is not discussed openly – the concept that adoptive parents need to build a sense of embracing the essence of their children and the notion that their children are theirs to parent and that they are deserving of the parenting role. Building a sense of entitlement and belonging is not the same as being attached. This sense is related to attachment, yet it differs. One can be firmly attached but not feel entitled or fully embrace the parenting role. One can feel quite entitled to a child who is not attaching well. There are quite a few reasons this becomes a complex discussion. It appears that entitlement is not just a task for adoptive parents who struggle with infertility, but also for adoptive parents who chose to adopt in lieu or in addition to becoming biological parents. Children raised in adoptive homes need to build their own sense of entitlement to their parents and having a family, but this is a two way street. This sense of entitlement also needs to be developed by extended family, grandparents, aunts, and uncles, etc.

The result of creating this sense is a warm network for a family that feels they belong together and deserve one another. When a sense of entitlement is lacking, the feeling that something is missing in the relationships can develop and can be skirted around uncomfortably.

One of the first steps in adoption is being honest with oneself about the motivation to adopt. This often means the adoptive parents must face their feelings about infertility and the loss that accompanies that. For adoptees, this may involve understanding why they are adopted. It is also important to fully embrace that there are unavoidable ways a child who is not related by birth may have differences from the family through “nature versus nurture”. Some adoptive families have chosen to honor the mother  who “gave life” to their child by lighting a candle, saying a prayer, writing a letter to her or some open recognition of her role in their life around Mother’s day. It is also important to recognize the family will have to develop a public “story” of why they have chosen to adopt and why the child has been placed for adoption. One of the gifts we can give our children is our willingness to do the personal work necessary to embrace our own senses of entitlement as parents in adoption and to join our family and friends with us in that process.

In the classic children’s book, the Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams, the Rabbit asks “What is real?” And the skin horse, the philosopher of the nursery responded by reminding the rabbit that, yes, becoming real does sometimes hurt, and that it usually doesn’t happen easily to people who need to be “carefully kept.” Real, advised the skin horse, usually happens after your fur has been loved off and your eyes have dropped out, but that doesn’t matter. For when you are real, you can only be ugly to those who do not understand.

Building a sense of entitlement to one another is a part of the claiming and bonding process for all of those in adoption-expanded families. It’s about believing, with all of one’s being, that you are  that you are deserving, of these children whose life you share  in memory with the birth parents who gave them that gift. As you feel entitled and fall in love with your child, you know that you belong together as a whole strong family.

FACES: Client Transitions from an Introvert to a Leader!

Diagnosed with mild mental retardation, depression, and schizoaffective disorder, 25-year-old Deborah came into LSG’s FACES program in 2009.  When Deborah first moved in to her new host home, as arranged by LSG, she had a difficult time adjusting to her new life, family, and environment.  Her support companion, Mary, had opened her homes to other FACES clients in the past and therefore had many years of experience in working with participants who have challenging behaviors. At the beginning, Deborah’s behavior was lethargic and she was uninterested in doing things around the home and in the community.  Mary and her family worked each day with Deborah to conquer the issues that prevented her from being happy.  Every time Deborah’s LSG case manager came to conduct a home visit, Deborah would make great strides on her goals.   Currently, Debora’s personality is very outgoing; she is very happy and enjoys shopping.

Deborah also attends a day center, where she learns daily living skills and has been introduced to sign language.  Deborah is capable of speaking but she had always had an interest in learning sign language because she wants to be able to communicate with people who are deaf.  Since she has taken the classes, Deborah has assisted others in teaching basic sign language to people at the day center and at home.

During her time in her host home, Deborah has blossomed to become a beautiful, mature, well-rounded woman with goals, dreams, and accomplishments.  We pray and hope that Deborah continues to grow for many years to come!

REFUGEE SERVICES: Finding God in the Hearts of Children

“Like this? Miss Haley, like this?” a student asks, waving her construction paper creation in the air. Once assured that she is correct and that her creation matches the example, the student continues happily creating her masterpiece for art class in LSG’s ASAP After-School Program at Indian Creek Elementary School. Reflecting on my experience as a seminary student helping with the program, I have seen a glimpse of the kingdom of God from the students I tutor. The students are from a wonderful mix of backgrounds and from all over the globe. Refugees, immigrants, and native-born U.S. citizens learn, play, and create together.  The kids get along with simplicity and joy in the messy, beautiful world of elementary school tutoring, full of differences.

As I go forward in ministry, I can’t help but look back to these children as models. To my students and the Holy Spirit that works amongst them, it is my turn to ask “Like this? Does the kingdom of God look like this?”

Luke 18:16: “But Jesus called for them and said, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs.”

Haley Mills is a student at the Candler School of Theology of Emory University.  For her Contextual Education Community Placement, she served with Lutheran Service of Georgia’s Refugee Services weekly during the 2011-2012 school year as and ESL assistant teacher and as a tutor in the ASAP Afterschool Academic/Arts Program.